Trying to live a right life

All things related to beginning Zen Practice. Here is where to exchange information between those that have already started Zen training and those planning to do so.
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fuki
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by fuki » Tue Jun 04, 2019 5:47 am

Linda, I've stood in the face on drawn guns and knives, for me fear just doesn't make sense, it's part of my old life.
But it's not about you or me now (if you catch the drift) hence I made a difference for expedient-thingy sakes.
I'm happy if people have a "desire" of trying to live a "right life" it beats not caring or indifference, there's no right life relating to "view" but ofcourse there is relating to conduct, so conventional language of ppl saying and trying to life right is no problem for me, I support them.
:115:
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lindama
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by lindama » Tue Jun 04, 2019 6:10 am

yes Fuki, thanks for the wise and compassionate words. We all do the best we can, no blame.

Yet, for me, zen practice is about not believing our stories. At least that had a prominent place in my past... yes, ofc, we can't make ourselves do such things. I often think of our friend Oushi in such cases.... he was a passionate supporter of offering the full teaching to all as the deepest love and respect for one's humanity and possibility. very Linji ..... we see where it got him, sigh.
:115:

fuki wrote:
Tue Jun 04, 2019 5:47 am
Linda, I've stood in the face on drawn guns and knives, for me fear just doesn't make sense, it's part of my old life.
But it's not about you or me now (if you catch the drift) hence I made a difference for expedient-thingy sakes.
I'm happy if people have a "desire" of trying to live a "right life" it beats not caring or indifference, there's no right life relating to "view" but ofcourse there is relating to conduct, so conventional language of ppl saying and trying to life right is no problem for me, I support them.
:115:

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fuki
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by fuki » Tue Jun 04, 2019 6:18 am

lindama wrote:
Tue Jun 04, 2019 6:10 am
Yet, for me, zen practice is about not believing our stories.
True dear Friend, but it's rare to meet someone who has uprooted all imagination, but I understand and appreciate the light and angle of vision you're sharing. Like Joe you bring out the best in us (even when it's the worst) ;)
But I'm refraining from mentioning "true zen practise", one gets pinned down as "non-dual" "hindu" or whatever ppl imagine anyways, it's a forum afterall, so it's more about "people" for me, not as a choice, purr from the cats. :cat:
meldpunt seksueel misbruik in boeddhistische gemeenschappen.
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avisitor
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by avisitor » Tue Jun 04, 2019 12:41 pm

lindama wrote:
Tue Jun 04, 2019 5:39 am
It has nothing to do with fear. It just makes sense to avoid it.
Sure, when conditions allow for this avoidance
Someone once said that the lamp is connected to the floor and the floor is connected to the building which is connected to the ground which is connected to the earth which is connected to the universe. That we are apart of it all. If there is no separation then how can one avoid oneself?
lindama wrote:
Tue Jun 04, 2019 6:10 am
I often think of our friend Oushi in such cases.... he was a passionate supporter of offering the full teaching to all as the deepest love and respect for one's humanity and possibility. very Linji ..... we see where it got him, sigh.
Reminds me of another story of a man who gave of himself and ended being crucified at the hands of Romans at the request of the religious leaders of his own people.

Thank you Linda. You certainly provide food for thought.

narhwal90
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by narhwal90 » Sat Jul 20, 2019 9:05 pm

desert_woodworker wrote:
Fri Apr 26, 2019 10:22 pm
...
Ready to bend and adapt, and mind quiet and empty in order to reflect the friend's state back to him or her. This takes practice... . Cannot be faked-up.

Dunno. What I do is go to my bank twice a year or so and get 100 one-dollar bills. It's called a "strap". A "strap" of Singles.

The bank Teller will count them out for you on a fast counting machine device in front of you as you watch behind the thick bullet-resistant Plexiglas. "100", it says on the machine's LCD display when it's done, bright enough for you to see as the customer standing a few feet from her machine. Well, sometimes his machine.

I carry 10 or so singles in my wallet at all times. Whenever somebody asks me for dough, I give him or her some. One, two, three, or more singles. No biggie; Icch. Just give. People need.

Last Dec. I bought-up a strap of 100 TWO-dollar bills! I came to question later, though, if this was so cool after all: suppose the folks asking for money are too hesitant to spend such a rare thing-y as a $2 bill? But, would they really keep it in their archive, pocket? Nah, I guess not. Meanwhile, it keeps my own wallet thinner to give out $2 bills instead of singles. I still have a few of them Deuces. Brand new. In serial-number-order. Crisp!!

Usually when I gave out singles, I'd give out at least TWO, and I'd say, "They're nicer in PAIRS".

Some guys/gals play music for me, some just ask for money, take it, and walk away.

I walk away quiet, and having given thanks if they played music. ;)

My own income is a little (1.5x?) above poverty-level, but I don't use ALL of it. I keep an eagle-eye out for who seems to need some on the street or byways, and if the folks ask, well, then, they get some. Well, this doesn't answer your question. But that wasn't my intention. ;)

Yours, and yours for all o' y'all,

nice to give out greenbacks when possible,

Share a smile and a handshake, etc., and sometimes a story!; Solid.


:namaste:

--Joe

Hi Joe- just wanted to thank you for priming my head on this front- I remembered your practice via the "strap" language though I got it confused with "brace", lol- its dollars not guns :) Anyhow, I volunteer at our center's welcome desk once a month, it is downtown and the street there has a number of lights frequented by panhandlers who have the light timing well understood so they can walk between the lanes past quite a few cars. Thankfully the folks on this street tend not to do the window washing, trying to obligate the drivers, but I always found it most uncomfortable to maintain the no-eye-contact-pretend-they-aren't-there thing.

Time before last I remembered your post and decided it was time to get honest and do them the courtesy of relating to them like human beings and not look away. I didn't have any cash on me then so had an interesting variety of responses, some said "no problem" and gave me a smile despite their obvious bad condition, one guy started prompting me for something else which made me wonder a bit- am I supposed to keep a bottle of beer or hand him my phone or something lol. But trying to fully experience the situation really made it clear to me that a few $ could be a big help for many folks- obviously some will be used for the various problems but not all will- and that its an opportunity to not dodge an uncomfortable situation. I had a shift last week and prepped the day before, getting a number of $1 bills in change and kept them ready in my shirt pocket for the drive in and out. It is a very different and far more honest experience at the lights to hand them a dollar with a smile, perhaps get a smile back, and drive on not having to pretend I wasn't pretending they didn't exist.

So, thanks! :)

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desert_woodworker
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by desert_woodworker » Thu Aug 08, 2019 12:14 am

N.,

Wow. Wow!

Thanks for the word. Beautiful; beautiful.

_/|\_ (in Gassho),

--Joe

avisitor
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by avisitor » Sun Aug 11, 2019 1:52 pm

Living a life that others follow ... is that leading?
It is hard to give of oneself to people we try to ignore as we pass by
Relating to them when all they want is money from you is even tougher
I remember giving to one individual and he commented by about ethnicity
Of course, I didn't single him out for being by the side of the road with his hand out
I don't know what the correct response would be
And, I have told my daughter, who was in the car with me, you can not tell who is deserving or not
So, the only thing you can do is to do what you believe is right for you.

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desert_woodworker
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by desert_woodworker » Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:29 pm

I still give away $2 bills. They're so unusual that some recipients glare at them a few moments: Real? Fake? Counterfeit? Play-Money? ;-)

Just give. All's swell,

--Joe

narhwal90
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by narhwal90 » Wed Aug 14, 2019 7:16 am

I have heard of some folks giving mittens during the winter or bags containing shampoo, toothbrushes and so on- i like that a lot but think its not well suited to a quick exchange at a stoplight. Those kinds of care packages are perhaps easier to distribute at a homeless shelter or food oantry. Regardless I'm not qualified to judge deserving or not till I've walked in their shoes.

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loves' the unjust
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by loves' the unjust » Wed Aug 14, 2019 8:04 am

./\.
cooper

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loves' the unjust
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by loves' the unjust » Wed Aug 14, 2019 8:21 am

I've solve the mystery of life.
find the meaning
it is wisdom
in Turkish means "hikmet"
not exactly cover the word wisdom but so.
in my translation to be able to do the things/works/jobs in the most right(proper) and appropriate (suitable) way.

,,
cooper

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loves' the unjust
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by loves' the unjust » Wed Aug 14, 2019 9:56 am

I'm not looking for any other meaning out of this.
cooper

avisitor
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by avisitor » Thu Aug 15, 2019 8:33 am

desert_woodworker wrote:
Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:29 pm
I still give away $2 bills. They're so unusual that some recipients glare at them a few moments: Real? Fake? Counterfeit? Play-Money? ;-)

Just give. All's swell,

--Joe
Just give?
Then does it become something that is just another form of reaction??
Nothing there to be mindful of?
Just going through the motions??

When one goes through life, should we just go through the motions??
Or, should one make the choices on what to do??

Reducing the interaction one has between people one encounters to just handing a two dollar bill???
Where is the wisdom in that?

Not saying it is wrong. Just maybe need a second look??
Really not understanding how this produces good Karma

narhwal90
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by narhwal90 » Thu Aug 15, 2019 10:40 am

So what do you do when a panhandler approaches you asking for something?

Spike
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by Spike » Thu Aug 15, 2019 4:16 pm

narhwal90 wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 10:40 am
So what do you do when a panhandler approaches you asking for something?
It would be good to have options. Most panhandlers are homeless. Most feel they have no other option. It is not clear to me what percent use the money for drugs or alcohol, but some surveys identify 60% of homeless as addicts.

If you're not scared or sense danger, maybe be kind, smile and make eye contact. That kind of treatment can mean a lot. Know in advance what social service resources are available in your area so you can make a referral if appropriate. A restaurant food gift card ($5 minimum for McDonalds) could be an option if you can afford it and decide to give something. A two dollar bill rather than two ones might not only cause a surprise reaction from the donee, but also during future exchange, for better or worse.

narhwal90
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by narhwal90 » Thu Aug 15, 2019 5:04 pm

Agreed, but what do you do?

Spike
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by Spike » Thu Aug 15, 2019 5:30 pm

narhwal90 wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 5:04 pm
Agreed, but what do you do?
Me personally? As a former psychotherapist for ten years my inclination is never to give money. Worked for a while at a drug and alcohol rehab clinic for ex-offenders, and don't want to risk fueling that population. I used to buy McDonalds gift certificates back in the day, anticipating a commute where panhandlers might approach if I had to stop for a particular traffic light. Since they would get in the road, that would be the extent of interaction. Never encountered panhandlers while on foot in the suburbs where I used to live. We'll see what happens down here in Delray. I have learned where to refer people if they need help. A case manager can be invaluable.

narhwal90
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by narhwal90 » Thu Aug 15, 2019 6:13 pm

i like the gift certificate idea, how are they received? The food pantry where i volunteer occasionally has grocery stoe gift cards we give to folks in the elderly/disabled home up the street, they are very much appreciated.

Spike
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by Spike » Thu Aug 15, 2019 7:45 pm

narhwal90 wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 6:13 pm
i like the gift certificate idea, how are they received? The food pantry where i volunteer occasionally has grocery stoe gift cards we give to folks in the elderly/disabled home up the street, they are very much appreciated.
Yes, always appreciated. Likewise, donations to or volunteership at worthy charities and organizations similar to yours that help those in need might be a consideration for others who want to help more broadly.

avisitor
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Re: Trying to live a right life

Post by avisitor » Sat Aug 17, 2019 2:37 am

narhwal90 wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 10:40 am
So what do you do when a panhandler approaches you asking for something?
Looking upon my experiences with such people in my past, I move on.
Knowing that I may have the compassion, I know that I do not have the wisdom to help them.
Like I told my daughter, just try to do what you believe is right for you.

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